Days 15-19 – a whirlwind
20 September, 2010
So many things have happened in the last few days, friends, I needed to come here and share (in summary, because I KNOW, I just KNOW I’ve been naughty)
- One of the most beautiful funerals I’ve ever been to
- A sailing course (Yes!!! I learned to sail a boat! “why?” you may ask, “because it’s OUT there!” – plus I really love being on the water and I wanted to learn a sustainable way to enjoy it)
- A minor fender-bender (coming home from aforementioned sailing course) and the weird feeling coming from that
- Hearing that a dear friend who’s been battling metastatic cancer is going through a bad patch – I’m thinking of love, the breath and yellow (lemon) Skittles – don’t ask – to get me through THAT one
- Challenges at the office – not just for me – but no man is an island, not matter WHAT Simon and Garfunkel say – so it’s been rough
- Not enough sleep
- The weird ability to demonstrate every pose I teach really well, and then have those very same asanas whoop my behind in daily practise (who HASN’T gone through this?)
- Being afraid to stand up from a backbend – I can drop back and am working to control it better, but coming up? Oy vey!
- Confusion over whether I can really given my heart to someone.
- Performance anxiety (not what YOU’RE thinking, it’s innocent) – I was asked to do a yoga demonstration at an event and aside from being sick (tonsillitis) and injured (knee), I was terrified and panicked and RAN. More on this, don’t let me forget it, please!
Right through the whole thing, the practice has been there, a constant, the lighthouse gleaming at times brightly, at times faintly, during the tempest, the calm in the midst of a whirlwind in 5 days. I’m tired, sore, emotional, distracted, a bit blurry….but ever more grateful that this practice has found me, a moving meditation, a place to talk with God, a physical unlocking of doors when I don’t always have the key, a laboratory in a 71″x 24″ x 3/16″ space. For this I am, as always, thankful with all my heart
So the practice is work….that’s OK…after all, it is the Prophet who says “Work is love made visible”